Love loves Love?

Contributor: Divyangna Sharma

Imagine waking up into a world where you are loved,

unconditionally. You are loved irrespective of how you

look, how you talk, earn, make friends, see, hear,

walk, sit, stand. Irrespective of how you choose to

love. I woke up in that world for 20 days. And not just

woke up; lived, laughed, cried, smiled, played and loved.

That place? Sri Ram Ashram.

I heard about Sri Ram Ashram for the very first time at

a conversational platform, Samvaad, organized by Youth

Alliance. Located in Haridwar, the Ashram supports an

orphanage for 68 orphaned children, a

school for 500 children, and a charitable medical

clinic. And that was that.

After Samvaad, I went back to school and to be true,

forgot about the Ashram. I have been working with an

NGO, Teach For India, for the past one year now,

teaching and learning with students from grades 7 and

8. It was in May when the sun planned to turn its heat

knob up and I had nothing planned for the big summer

event called the Summer Vacation. I had been advised

by people to intern in places which had fancy names,

some had beautiful causes while others were known for

their work across cities. I wanted to apply for two

places to intern when Shrutika, a Fellow at Teach For

India told me about the opportunity to manage a summer

camp for the kids at Sri Ram Ashram, Haridwar. And I

just held hands with it.

The planning for the structures, check-in with

volunteers, conversations with the kids at the Ashram,

the entire schedule was planned but one thing wasn't. I

had my inhibitions and suppositions which I held close

to my chest and bones. While traveling to the Ashram

on the 8th of June, I had a lot of questions scrambling,

scratching, jumping up and down the anxiety slide. How

should I be? What all will my limits be when asking a

question? Or what if I say something which might hurt

someone at the Ashram? All the what to dos and

especially, what I should not do?

But once I reached the gates of the Ashram, it just

took two minutes to feel home. I was there. From the

gravel path starting at the main gate where Tau ji

greets you, the Jamun tree laden pathways, the

fragrance of the numerable mango trees mixed with the

breeze from the river Ganga flowing near the Ashram to

the end of the gravel road where I met the first kid at

the Ashram, I was happy.

And from there started a bullet train which I guess

moved a little too fast for me. All the children at the

Ashram, except the ones from ages 0-3, were divided

into different teams, each led by two counselors which

were usually the grade 11 and 12 kids. The children at

the Ashram brainstormed on the name for their

respective teams, designed and painted their own t-

shirts and participated in the various challenges with

all their beautiful spirit and grit.

Different volunteers had signed up for the camp and

hence, the children at the Ashram got the exposure to

doodling, art, and crafts, expressive Mathematics, on-

hands learning with recycled materials, dance sessions,

theatre sessions, stone painting, personality

development sessions and critical thinking sessions.

Apart from what sounds to be a little in the box

schedule, we planned surprise challenges for the kids.

These included Sports Day (where every child was no

less than an athlete), Project Runway, Masterchef

Junior Challenge, Dance championship, theatre projects

with a mix of movie nights and swimming day. From day 1, 

I saw the kids creating actions plans, making

budgets for various challenges, standing up for their

teammates, collaborating with other teams to create

their masterpieces, taking care of the younger ones in

hand while they attended their sessions and love. I saw love.

And while this took the broader, outer frame, each day

was a challenge for me too. From planning the schedule

for each day to the planning of the challenge and sessions

with the volunteers, I didn't know if I was doing

enough, I could not validate myself and I knew at the

end of each day what could have been done better, with

more planning, with just more of something. But

whenever these doubts did come in, the people at the

Ashram would just make them vanish, literally. From

Rashmi Di, who manages the Ashram to Seema Didi,

warden, none would let you feel any less than what you

deserve or I would say more. I take my time knowing and

opening up to people, but the space made me shed one

layer of inhibition after another through their

compassion, empathy and most importantly, by just being.

One of the best places in the Ashram? The kitchen where

we ate the food prepared by the family every day

including fruits, a tall glass of milk and smiles

(there were lots of those  ). There were also times

when Seema didi would sneak me in a different kitchen

and served me with a twist in the kitchen made food!

The kids at the Ashram would openly share their stories

and their Pandora box of ideas, without the hesitation

which I have felt for most of my life, they would feel and

say what they felt without filters and that got me

thinking of how I have let go of many of those things

for a certain fear and how can I welcome it all back

into my summer camp, life, if at all.

The Ashram personifies love for me, where I saw

children not competing but participating together in

teams, where I saw or rather felt empathy and

compassion in actions of each person there, where the

love can be felt just by being around the children, by

seeing them play and also, learning how to actually

play from them.

On the last day, while everyone danced to the tunes of

the DJ, I was in the kitchen, cutting vegetables and

applying ghee to the chappatis, because from inside the

kitchen, I could see them, all at once, the ashram, the

kids laughing and dancing, the people in the kitchen

preparing the meal and I wanted it to last and not be the last.

I cannot express enough gratitude either through words

or an action as to what the Ashram has given me in

terms of space, in terms of love or in terms of each

minute spent there. I am grateful that I could let go

of assumptions which I could let go of and the love

which I could accept.

I know, for now, LOVE LOVES LOVE.